daisies

These are gerbera daisies, my favorite flower. I also love lilacs. Aimee helped put the picture on my profile. Thanks Aimee!

I'd Love To Be Six Again

A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday. "I'd love to be six again," she replied.

On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear--everything there was! Wow!

Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to McDonald's they went, where her husband ordered her a Big Mac, along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie- the latest Star Wars epic, and hot dogs, popcorn, Coke, and M+M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed.

He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well dear, what was it like being six again?"

One eye opened. The wife said, "You idiot, I meant my dress size!"

The moral of the story is: If a woman speaks and a man is actually listening, he will still get it wrong.

how smart are you?

Riddle #1 The man who invented it doesn't want it. The man who bought it doesn't need it. The man who needs it doesn't know it. What is it?

Riddles #2 I never was, am always to be,
No one ever saw me, or ever will,
And yet I am the confidence of all
To live and breathe on this terrestrial ball.
What am I?

Riddle #3 If you break me, I do not stop working,
If you touch me, I may be snared,
If you lose me, nothing will matter.
What am I?

nothin' much

i'm sitting here trying to think of something original to post.....hard work...(thinking, that is)....ah!, just the thing, nicknames! VERY original! soooo.... i guess most of you know my current nickname: mom. no, i don't particularly like it, but i guess i did earn it. see, our young peoples was planning this dinner, and some people weren't working as hard as others, so i guess i started SUGGESTING things for them to do..... okay, i was being bossy, but come on, i'm not ALWAYS bossy. anyway, other nicknames i've had: kayla-wayla (because it rhymes?), wylie( from josh, no idea where that came from), zoe ( not explaining that one), alyak ( from brandy, it's my name backwards), and finally, my favorite: kayke ( pronounced "cake"). the boys at church used to call me that a LOOONG time ago. why? because i am so sweet, of course! :) anyway, enough about me, you guys should tell me some of yours, okay? please?! :D

Little Phil

More Jokes?! (yes, i'm afraid so.)

Commanding the Dumb
As we stood in formation at the Pennsacola Naval Air Station, our Flight Instructor said," All right! All you dummies, fall out."

As the rest of the squad wandered away, I remained attention.

The instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye with me, and then just raised a single eyebrow. I smiled and said," Sure was alot of em', huh sir?"

Practical joke on his ex-girlfriend
The soldier serving in Hong Kong was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their engagement and asking for her photograph back.

He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women he could find, bundled them together, and sent them back with a note saying," I regret to inform you that I cannot remember which one is you--please keep your photograph and send the others back.

aww, precious!

This is my baby brother Phil. Pretty cute,huh? :)

i'm bored...........

i'm at Aimee's house right now. Aimee and Britt are cutting out fabric for a costume for Aimee. the fabric is black and purple. we are also watching re-runs. actually, i am watching re-runs, they are cutting fabric. that's why i'm bored. they will probably yell at me when they read this. at least i won't be bored anymore. and mike(y) won't copy this post. (haha!) i think maybe josh is making brownies right now. i hope so. i love brownies. yum! he makes the best macaroni, so maybe his brownies will be good too. whatever you guys do, DON'T read the post on here titled Haha! there is a scary conversation going on there. my apologies. i probably should delete it, but i'm too lazy i guess. :) anyway, i'm missing the re-runs. hopefully i will post again, ya know, if Aimee and Brittany don't kill me when they read this. Bye.


:( :0 :) :P ~~( 8:>

blonde jokes, oh yeah!

Car Problems?
A beautiful, young blonde told her friend," I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off when I took my car in for maintenance."
"Did he try to repair something that wasn't broken?", said her friend.
" No, he didn't."
"Did he try to overcharge you?"
" No. In fact, all he said was I needed blinker fluid."

Green Side Up
A woman hired a contracter to repaint the interior of her house. The woman walked the man through the second floor of her house and told him what colors she wanted. As they walked through the first room, the woman said, " I think I would like this room in a cream color." The man wrote this down, opened it and yelled out,"Green side up!" This baffled the woman, but she was hesitant to say anything. In the next room, the woman said she would like it painted in a rose color. Again, the man wrote this down opened the window, and yelled,"Green side up!" Struck with curiosity, the woman mustered up every nerve to ask, " Why do you keep yelling 'Green side up' out my window every time I tell you the color I want?" The contractor replied,
" Because I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street."

Hot and Cold
A blonde walked into a drug store top do some shopping. While walking around, she kept noticing a shiny object behind the counter. When she went to pay, she asked the cashier," What's that shiny object behind the counter?"
The cashier told her,"That's a thermos."
" What does it do?", the blonde asked.
" It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold" replied the cashier.
The blonde thought that was incredible, so she bought it. The next day at work, her boss(another blonde), came to her desk and asked her," What's thatt shiny object?"
The blonde worker replied," It is a thermos."
Intrigued, the boss asked what it did. The worker told her it kept hot things hot and cold things cold. Her boss then asked what she had in it.
" Well, right now, I have a popsicle and coffee in it."

quotes from movies ( i know, boring!)

from Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
Will Turner: Where's Elizabeth?
Jack Sparrow: She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we're all men of our word really... except for Elizabeth, who is in fact, a woman.

Jack Sparrow( to Weatherby Swann): I think we've all arrived at a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically.
Jack Sparrow( to Commodore Norrington): I want you to know that I was rooting for you. Know that.
Jack Sparrow: Elizabeth... it never would have worked between us, love. I'm sorry... Will... nice hat. Friends... This is the day you will ALWAYS remember as the day that you ..... (backs up and trips over ledge)

Jack Sparrow: If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it.

Will Turner: We're going to steal a ship? That ship?
Jack Sparrow: Comandeer. We're going to comandeer that ship. Nautical term.

from Emma
Emma : The most beautiful thing in the world is a match well made.

Miss Bates: It left us speechless, quite speechless I tell you, and we have not stopped talking of it since.

Emma : Not one in a hundred men have "gentleman" so plainly written across them as Mr. Knightly.

Mr. Knightly: You didn't ask me to contribute a riddle.
Emma: Your entire personality is a riddle, Mr. Knightly. I thought you overqualified.

from Disney's Beauty and the Beast

Gaston: It's not right for a woman to read. Soon she starts getting "ideas" and "thinking"....

Beast: I want to do something for her... but what?
Cogsworth: Oh there's the usual things; flowers, chocolates, promises you don't intend to keep...

Gaston: This is the day your dreams come true.
Belle: What do you know about my dreams, Gaston?
Gaston: Plenty! Here, picture this... a rustic hunting lodge.. my latest kill roasting on the fire... and my little wife, massaging my feet... while the little ones play on the floor with the dogs... we'll have six or seven.
Belle: Dogs?
Gaston: No,Belle! Strapping boys, like me!
Belle: Imagine that.
Gaston: And do you know who that little wife will be?
Belle: Let me think...
Gaston:You, Belle!
Belle: Gaston.... I-I'm speechless...I really don't know what to say...
Gaston: Say you'll marry me!
Belle: I'm very sorry... but...but I just don't deserve you.

Beast: You- You came back.
Belle: Of course I came back. I couldn't let them...Oh this is all my fault. If only I'd gotten here sooner.
Beast: Maybe it's better..it's better this way.
Belle: Don't talk like that. You'll be all right. We're together now.Everything's going to be fine, you'll see.
Beast: At least... I got to see you... one last time.

Cogsworth: Enchanted? He-he Ha-ha! Who said anything about the castle being enchanted? Ha-ha...
(to Lumiere)
It was you, wasn't it.

to nicole: i fixed my blog so that anyone can post, not just blog members. now you have no excuse. (haha!) :)

Haha!

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school.

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. The classroom became a bit unruly and he admonished them. This happened several times.

When he could do work at his desk, the strong breeze made his tie flap annoyingly. He kept rearranging and rearranging his tie as the class raised it's level of uneasiness.

Finally, becoming disgusted with the wayward tie, he stood up and took a big stapler off his desk and stapled the tie to his chest in several places.

Discipline was not a problem from that day forth.

Poem by me

okay, i guess i'm feeling kind of brave right now, so i'm going to post one of my poems. if some of it sounds kinda funny, or doesn't seem to flow right, that's because i had a tune in my head when i wrote it, and it sounds better as a song. ....and no, i won't sing it for you. ....hope you like it.....
**********************************************

" Turn that frown
Upside-down.
You've got to smile," he says,
"Can it really be that bad,
What could make you so, so sad?
When you've got me as a friend."

Well, I guess that goes to show
That he really doesn't know
What's in my heart and head.
Seems like I'm never gonna win,
'Cause his heart just won't give in,
And mine's as heavy as lead.

How do I tell him
This can't go on forever?
How do I make him see?,
That the one I'm dreamin' of,
The man I want to love,
Is the one right in front of me.

Somehow he's got to know,
But I don't want to throw
What we do have away.
But I can't take this much longer,
'Cause this feeling's gettin' stronger...
I just wish he'd say,
"How do I tell you
This can't go on forever,
How do I make you see?,
That the one I'm dreamin' of,
The girl I want to love,
Is the one right in front of me."

I guess I should have known,
But I really didn't see,
That the man I thought I'd never have
Was really lovin' me.
And he told me so one day,
With a smile on his face,
He took me by the hand,
And then he said to me,
" How do I tell you
This can't go on forever,
How do I make you see?,
That the one I'm dreamin' of,
The girl I've always loved,
Is the one right in front of me."

Yay! I finally figured out how to post pictures! Not sure if I'll be able to do it again though... Anyway, for those of you who don't know, this is my family. I am the oldest, and then Brittany(16), Travis(15), Amanda(14), Josiah(12), Caleb(10), Megan(8), Seth(6), Erica(2), and Phillip(5 months). I think it's a pretty nice picture, don't you?

i know i don't post very often about myself, but i never really know what to write about. i didn't really do anything this week, except soccer last night, which was SUPER FUN! we should do that more often i think. but other than that, i didn't go shopping or anything else, except for work, of course. i'm really tired right now. we didn't get home last night 'til 11:30 ( or maybe a little later), and then my younger sister was talking to me 'til 1:45 , and then i didn't gt to sleep until like 2:30. ...........i want to post some conference pictures on my blog, but i can't figure out how to get them from our digital camera to a folder, 'cause we have this weird picture program on our computer and it won't let me put the pictures on here. it's really annoying. ........ i was also thinking about posting some of my poems on here, but i haven't been brave enough to do that yet. (obviously) .....i don't feel very good right now because i drank a whole bunch of Mountain Dew thinking that the caffiene (spelling?) would give me an energy boost, but it kinda just made me sick. i suppose i should have known better, but i guess not. ....i can't think of anything else to post, so, umm....bye
(hopefully i won't be so tired next time i post, that way it won't sound so depressing :) )

Forgiven, written by A. A. Milne

I found a little beetle, so that Beetle was his name,

And I called him Alexander and he answered just the same.

I put him in a match-box, and I kept him all the day...

---

And Nanny let my beetle out-

Yes, Nanny let my beetle out-

She went and let my beetle out-

And Beetle ran away.

---

She said she didn't mean it,

and I never said she did,

She said she wanted matches

and she just took off the lid,

---

She said that she was sorry, but it's difficult to catch

An excited sort of beetle you've mistaken for a match.

---

She said that she was sorry, and I really mustn't mind,

As there's lots and lots of beetles which she's certain we could find,

If we looked about the garden for the holes where beetles hid-

And we'd get another match-box and write BEETLE on the lid.

---

We went to all the places which a beetle might be near,

And we made the sort of noises which a beetle likes to hear,

And I saw a kind of something, and I gave a sort of shout:

"A beetle-house and Alexander Beetle coming out!"

---

It was Alexander Beetle I'm as certain as can be

And he had a sort of look as if he thought it must be ME,

And he had a sort of look as if he thought he ought to say:

"I'm very, very sorry that I tried to run away."

---

And Nanny's very sorry too for you-know-what-she-did,

And she's writing ALEXANDER very blackly on the lid.

So Nan and Me are friends, because it's difficult to catch

An excited Alexander you've mistaken for a match.

i really do like blondes............

An Irishman, a Mexican, and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, " Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."
The Mexican opened his lunchbox and exclaimed, " Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off too."
The blonde opened his lunchbox and said, "Bologna agian. If I get bologna one more time I'm going to jump too."
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunchbox, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunchbox, saw a burrito and jumped too.
The blonde guy opened his lunchbox, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.
At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, " If I'd known how really tired of corned beef and cabbage he was I never would have given it to him again!"
The Mexican's wife also wept. "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas. I didn't realize he hated burritos so much!"
Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife.
.................are you ready for it?.....................
"Hey, don't look at me," she said, " he makes his own lunch!"

very strange....

More monopoly money is printed yearly than real money throughout the world.
Penuins are not found in the North Pole.
A dentist invented the electric chair.
A cockroach can live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
About a hundred people choke to death on ballpoint pens each year.
Fish scales are an ingredient in most lipsticks.
On average, every chocolate bar contains at least three insect legs.
1 in 5,000 north Atlantic lobsters is born bright blue.
11% of the world is left-handed.
27% of Americans believe we never landed on the moon.
By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand.
One in ten people live on an island.
It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with.
Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
A Chicago law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
A fish's memory span is three seconds.
A Michigan law states that a wife's hair legally belongs to her husband.
A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if her husband does not gave her coffee.
According to Illinios state law, it is illegal to speak English. The officailly recognized language is "American."